Filthy, Obscure Greek Myths, Accidentally Preserved by Clement of Alexandria

The early Christian writer Clement of Alexandria (lived c. 150 – c. 215 CE) was probably born in Athens, but he lived most of his life in Alexandria, where he was a teacher at the Catechetical School, also known as the Didaskalion. He was extraordinarily well educated and well read in ancient Greek literature, mythology, philosophy, and theology. As a devout Christian, however, he believed that traditional Greek and Roman religions were rife with immorality and depravity. His earliest surviving work is a treatise titled Exhortation to the Hellenes, in which he condemns traditional Greek and Roman religions and exhorts Greeks and Romans to adopt Christianity.

One of Clement’s primary goals in the treatise is to prove just how perverted and morally depraved traditional religions are. He rightly points out the immoral and often rapacious behavior of the Olympian deities in the stories that are well known, but he also retells some extremely obscure and absolutely filthy Greek myths that are not recorded in any other sources before him. As a result, Clement accidentally preserved these myths for posterity—myths that we otherwise would have no idea even existed. (One of them involves a god inventing a dildo in order to anally masturbate on a dead lover’s grave!)

Baubo flashes Demeter

Clement gives an account of the Eleusinian Mysteries, which, as I mentioned in this previous article I wrote about the relationship between Greek mystery religions and Christianity, were centered around the goddesses Demeter and Persephone. In Exhortation to the Hellenes 2.20, Clement tells a story that he claims is associated with the Eleusinian Mysteries.

He says that, after Hades abducted Persephone and forcibly took her to the Underworld, Demeter became angry and caused all the crops to wither and she went to the site of Eleusis. There, at Eleusis, a woman named Baubo received her as a guest. Here is Clement’s own account of what happened next, as translated by G. W. Butterworth for the Loeb Classical Library:

“But to continue; for I will not forfear to tell the rest of the story. Baubo, having received Demeter as a guest, offers her a draught of wine and meal. She declines to take it, being unwilling to drink on account of her mourning. Baubo is deeply hurt, thinking she has been slighted, and thereupon uncovers her secret parts [τὰ αἰδοῖα] and exhibits them to the goddess. Demeter is pleased at the sight, and now at least receives the draught,—delighted by the spectacle! These are the secret mysteries of the Athenians!”

In other words, Baubo openly flashed Demeter and Demeter liked it.

To prove that he is not making this up and that he actually has a source for this story, Clement goes on to quote five lines of an Orphic poem in dactylic hexameter:

“ῶς εἰποῦσα πέπλους ἀνεσύρατο, δεῖξε δὲ πάντα
σώµατος οὐδὲ πρέποντα τύπον· παῖς δ᾽ἦεν ῍Ιακχος,
χειρί τέ µιν ῥίπτασκε γελῶν Βαυβοῦς ὑπὸ κόλποις
ἡ δ᾽ἐπεὶ οὖν µείδησε θεά, µείδης᾽ ἐνὶ θυµῷ,
δέξατο δ᾽ αἰόλον ἂγγος, ἐν ᾡ κυκεὼν ἐνέκειτο.”

This means, in my own English translation:

“Having said this, she lifted up her dress, and she showed all parts
of her body that were not appropriate: and there was the child Iacchos,
and, laughing, he plunged his hand underneath the pubic region of Baubo.
And then the goddess smiled, she smiled in her soul,
and she received the shining cup, in which the concoction was contained.”

Clement’s Exhortation to the Hellenes is the earliest surviving ancient source that mentions the story of Baubo exposing her vulva to Demeter. The later Christian writer Eusebios of Kaisareia (lived c. 263 – c. 339 CE) quotes Clement’s account of the story his Preparation for the Gospel 2.11.1-23.9. Another Christian writer, Arnobius of Sicca (lived c. 255 – c. 330 CE), gives an account of the story in his Adversus Nationes 5.24-26 that is almost entirely a translation of Clement’s account.

Eusebios and Arnobius, however, were both clearly relying on Clement and they only mention the story because Clement mentioned it first, meaning that the only reason why this story has survived to the present day is because Clement retold it in order to prove how perverted the Greek mysteries were.

ABOVE: Photograph from Wikimedia Commons of a small terra-cotta figure from the Greek island of Paros depicting a fertility figure, sometimes said to represent Baubo

The story of Dionysos and Prosymnos

Clement records another, even filthier story in Exhortation to the Hellenes 2.30. He begins his account by describing with disgust how people would dedicate φαλλοί (i.e., models of human penises, which were essentially dildos) to the god Dionysos.

Clement then proceeds to narrate the story that Greek people told about the supposed origin of these model penises. Clement, being very Christian and averse to describing sexual matters in too much detail, tries to narrate the story in the most discrete manner he possibly can. It is, however, fairly obvious what he is actually describing. Here is Clement’s account of the story, as translated by William Wilson:

“But those contests and phalloi consecrated to Dionysos were a world’s shame, pervading life with their deadly influence. For Dionysos, eagerly desiring to descend to Hades, did not know the way; a man, by name Prosymnos, offers to tell him, not without reward. The reward was a disgraceful one, though not so in the opinion of Dionysos: it was an Aphrodisian favour that was asked of Dionysos as a reward. The god was not reluctant to grant the request made to him, and promises to fulfil it should he return, and confirms his promise with an oath.”

“Having learned the way, he departed and again returned: he did not find Prosymnos, for he had died. In order to acquit himself of his promise to his lover, he rushes to his tomb, and burns with unnatural lust. Cutting a fig-branch that came to his hand, he shaped the phallos, and so performed his promise to the dead man. As a mystic memorial of this incident, phalloi are raised aloft in honour of Dionysos through the various cities.”

For those who haven’t picked up on what Clement is saying, I’ll be more explicit: Dionysos was looking for a way into the Underworld. A man named Prosymnos offered to tell him how to get into the Underworld under the condition that, if he told him, Dionysos would allow him to anally penetrate him once he returned. Dionysos eagerly agreed to this arrangement, but, when he came back, he found that Prosymnos was already dead, so, in order to fulfill his promise to him, he carved a dildo out of a fig branch and anally masturbated himself on Prosymnos’s grave.

Once again, Clement’s Exhortation to the Hellenes is the earliest surviving ancient source that tells the story of Dionysos anally masturbating on Prosymnos’s grave. The only other ancient writer who mentions the story is Arnobius of Sicca in his Adversus Nationes 5.28, but his account is clearly based on Clement’s and he only mentions it because Clement mentioned it first. This means that, once again, the only reason why this story has survived to the present day is because Clement retold it in order to prove just how perverted Greek mythology was.

ABOVE: Photograph from Wikimedia Commons of an Attic red-figure column-krater dating to c. 470 BCE depicting a naked woman carrying a gigantic phallus

Dirty epithets for the deities

In effort to prove just how immoral and ridiculous the worship of the Greek deities truly is, Clement lists a series of bizarre and/or obscene epithets for various deities in his Exhortation to the Hellenes 2.37. Some of these epithets are really dirty.

For instance, Clement says that Aphrodite was known as Καλλίπυγος (Kallípygos). The first part of this epithet is simply the third-declension neuter noun κάλλος (kállos), meaning “beauty.” The second part of the epithet, however, is the first-declension feminine noun πυγή (pygḗ), which, as I previously discussed in my article in February 2021 about ancient Greek swear words, means “buttocks” or “ass.” The epithet therefore means “One with the Beautiful Buttocks” or, if we were to translate it more crassly, “Sexy-Assed.”

ABOVE: Photograph from Wikimedia Commons of a marble statue of Aphrodite Kallipygos on display in the Naples National Archaeological Museum

Clement also tells us that Dionysos was known by the epithet χοιροψάλας (choiropsálas). The first element of this epithet is the second-declension masculine noun χοῖρος (choîros), which, as I also discussed in my swear words article, literally means “pig,” but was commonly used as a vulgar slang word for the female genitalia, particularly those of a young woman, closely analogous to the English word “pussy.” The second element of the name is derived from the verb ψάλλω (psállō), meaning “to pluck.” The epithet therefore literally means “Pussy-Plucker.”

Clement explains this epithet by saying, as translated by Butterworth: “The Sikyonians worship Dionysos as the god who presides over the woman’s secrete parts; thus they reverence the originator of licentiousness, as overseer of what is shameful.”

ABOVE: Photograph from the website Vaginamuseum showing a Roman figurine dating to c. 100 BCE depicting a naked woman riding on the back of a pig with her legs spread apart to display her vulva