How the Ancients Greeted Each Other

In modern films and television shows, people from the ancient world are commonly shown greeting each other with a rather peculiar handshake in which, instead of merely clasping hands, each person grasps the other’s forearm. Films and television shows tend to most frequently associate this gesture with Roman men, but it has been portrayed in other contexts as well.

Many people will be disappointed to learn that the forearm handshake is not shown in any extant work of ancient art, nor is it ever referred to in any surviving work of ancient literature. We have no evidence that anyone ever used this handshake in antiquity and it appears to be purely a modern invention. This, however, raises a very interesting question: How did ancient people really greet each other?

The origins of the forearm handshake

The forearm handshake seems to have originated from late nineteenth-century theatrical adaptations of Lew Wallace’s bestselling 1880 novel Ben-Hur: A Tale of the Christ, set in the Roman Empire during the time of Jesus. In the early twentieth century, film adaptations of the novel began to be produced and the forearm handshake was introduced to the silver screen.

Producers clearly loved the forearm handshake, presumably because of its ability to illustrate masculine comradery; soon, they began using it in nearly all films set in the ancient world. Apparently no one bothered to fact check whether such a handshake actually existed during ancient times. The forearm handshake has since managed to trickle out of historical drama and into fantasy films and television as well.

How the ancients really shook hands

The ancient Greeks and Romans seem to have had two main different ways of greeting each other. The first was an ordinary handshake, always performed with the right hand and without any grasping of the forearms. (The left hand was commonly perceived as unclean and to offer someone one’s left hand was regarded as extremely rude.)

It is unclear where exactly the handshake originates from; one hypothesis holds that it may have originated from checking to make sure the person you were meeting was not carrying any weapons. I remain skeptical of this explanation, however, since the ancient Greeks were not exactly keen on the idea of carrying weapons when they were not at war and shaking someone’s hand is not a particularly effective means of deducing that someone is not holding a weapon, since the other person could, you know, just have it in the other hand.

Ironically, we actually know quite a lot about ancient handshakes because leaders frequently commissioned sculptures showing themselves shaking hands with their patron gods or with foreign leaders as a show of friendship. Handshakes are also frequently shown on ancient funerary steles. Interestingly, not a single one of these depictions shows anything resembling the infamous forearm handshake.

ABOVE: This ancient Greek relief carving, dated to 403 or 402 B.C., shows the goddesses Hera (right) and Athena (left) shaking hands as a show of peace between their respective cities of Samos and Athens.

ABOVE: This ancient Greek funerary stele from circa 375 – 350 B.C. shows a husband named Thraseas shaking hands with his wife Euandria.

A kiss as a form of greeting

The second common method of greeting was a kiss on the hand, the cheek, or even the lips. This may sound very strange to modern readers, since most people today tend to associate kissing with romance and sexuality. In the ancient world, however, kissing was not necessarily seen as romantic at all and it was often used as a friendly greeting, even among mere acquaintances.

The ancient Greek historian Herodotos of Halikarnassos (lived c. 484 – c. 425 BC) describes how kissing was a common form of greeting among the Achaemenid Persians. He writes in his Histories 1.134.1, as translated by A. D. Godley:

“When one [Persian] man meets another on the road, it is easy to see if the two are equals; for, if they are, they kiss each other on the lips without speaking; if the difference in rank is small, the cheek is kissed; if it is great, the humbler bows and does obeisance to the other.”

The later Greek historian Xenophon (lived c. 430– 354 BC) recounts in his Kyropaidia 1.4.28 (which he probably wrote in around 370 BC) that the Persians also kissed each other whenever they parted ways.

The Roman poet Marcus Valerius Martialis, commonly known in English as “Martial,” alludes to the practice of kissing as a form of greeting in his Epigram 21 against Postumus in Book II of his Epigrams:

“To some, Postumus, you give kisses, to some your right hand. ‘Which do you prefer?’ you say, ‘choose.’ I prefer your hand.”

In his ninety-fifth epigram in Book VII, Martial warns:

“It is winter, and rude December is stiff with ice; yet you dare, Linus, to stop every one who meets you, on this side and on that, with your freezing kiss, and to kiss, indeed, the whole of Rome. What could you do more severe or more cruel, if you were assaulted and beaten? I would not have a wife kiss me in such cold as this, or the affectionate lips of an innocent daughter.”

“But you are more polite, more refined, you, from whose dog-like nose depends a livid icicle, and whose beard is as stiff as that of a Cinyphian he-goat, which the Cilician barber clips with shears. I prefer meeting a hundred of the vilest characters, and I have less fear of a recently consecrated priest of Cybele. If, therefore, Linus, you have any sense or decency, defer, I pray you, your winter salutations till the month of April.”

Similarly, in Epigram 18 from Book XIII, Martial warns:

“Whenever you have eaten strong-smelling shreds of the Tarentine leek, give kisses with your mouth shut.”

As these quotations may already indicate, kissing was seen as more intimate than a handshake and not everyone was exactly a fan of it. Handshakes were seen as more formal. Nonetheless, the Roman fondness for kissing is illustrated by the fact that they had three different words for it: osculum (a kiss on the hand or cheek), basium (a kiss on the lips as a greeting or show of friendship), and suavium (a passionate kiss on the lips).

While Martial may have preferred the handshake, his Christian contemporaries evidently preferred the kiss. Explicit injunctions to “Greet one another with a holy kiss” are found in 1 Thessalonians 5:26, Romans 16:16, 1 Corinthians 16:20, 2 Corinthians 13:12, and 1 Peter 5:14. Additional references to kissing as a Christian greeting are found in the descriptions of the kiss of Judas in Mark 14:43-45, Matthew 26:47-50, and Luke 22:47-48.

In his Paidogogos, the early Christian philosopher Clement of Alexandria (lived c. 150 – c. 215 AD) specifically warns Christians not to kiss each other too lasciviously when greeting one another, indicating that some may have seen it as more than just a greeting.

Ultimately, it seems the formal handshake displaced the kiss as a form of greeting. As kissing gradually became regarded as a predominately, if not exclusively, erotic act, it became no longer seen as appropriate as a greeting. Some Christian congregations still employ the “kiss of peace” as part of their liturgy, but most no longer do. Handshakes, meanwhile, remain common. While world leaders no longer carve images of themselves shaking hands in stone, they still do shake hands and their handshakes can have complex political symbolism behind them.